I've got the website, I've got the CraigsList...how am I doing?

[Donnagal]

I saw on the newsletter that you wouldn't mind critiqueing websites and Craigslist ads and I would love it if I could take you up on the offer. I've just been certified last November and I do have a couple of classes I'm teaching right now, but I know I need to build the privates. Any advice would be most welcome. By the way: I LOVE all of your emails and your spirits! Here is the Craigslist ad and my web site:

Durango Colorado Desert Nomad Yoga

Yoga Therapy & Fitness Counseling in Durango Colorado

Love,
Donna

[Donnagal]

I'm sure your busy and perhaps I should be practicing patience, but in my day job I've learned that it helps to keep "pinging" from time to time. Plus, it lets you know how much I respect and am counting on your advice

[Sara]

Hi it's Sara and Harlan and I are looking at your Craigslist ad.

I'm here to calm him down.

Here's your ad:

"Bring me your tired, your stressed, your inflexible!" Take personal charge of your own health and wellbeing by investing in yourself. Private Yoga instruction in Durango, Colorado. You may be a professional mountainbiker looking for ways to regain your flexibility and improve your strength, or you may be someone who hasn't been able to exercise in months or even years due to injury or illness. Whoever you are, at Desert Nomad Yoga we can customize a yoga program that will bring you: greater stamina & strength, improve flexibility, reduce stress and return you to the beautiful person you are without the tension and help support your recovery whether from injury or illness. We also offer counseling in lifestyle change & general fitness. For more information, visit our website at Durango Colorado Desert Nomad Yoga.
Namaste! "

First, we don't believe in telling everyone up front that your ad is about yoga.

It lets people judge you and skip your ad without even glancing inside.

So the number one key is: Get your ad open.

Don't talk about yoga in the subject line.

Second, do you see the spacing in your ad?

Look at the spacing I'm using. Which is easier to read?

Harlan points out that your opening line is a joke and humor does not work in marketing. Get right into the major benefits.

If you met an old friend and they asked you about yoga, would you answer them in just 6 sentences?

Or would you go on and explain more?

The first ad Harlan wrote for me in Craigslist (reprinted in our first printed newsletter) was very long.

But my schedule filled with private clients in under two weeks.

The ad captured the mindset of the person who was curious about yoga.

Are there so many mountain bikers interested in yoga?

Is that why you are marketing to them?

If you are, consider and ad aimed just at mountainbikers?

Subject line: The Secret To Become A Better Mountain Biker

Notice, it says nothing about yoga.

Also, please don't use yoga jargon such as Namaste or other sanskrit words. It turns people away.

We'd love to look at your next ad.

Best wishes.

Namaste!

Sara

[Donnagal]

Thanks for your review and I'll get right on the rewrite!